22 Awesomely Bad Book Covers

These paperbacks deserve to be judged by their covers.

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We've all been introduced to the pop-culture eye-bleed that is Awkward Family Photos. Keeping with the fad's benignly disturbing nature, we turn the focus to something else that's littering shelves: Awesomely bad book covers.

From computer-generated elf abs to painfully awkward photography, here's a selection of the best of the worst book covers we could find. Grab the tissues.

Bad book covers

Tragic puns and threatening flammables, now there’s a good match.

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We’re still working on cool (if only we had such a diverse group of friends who rock wicked-awesome sweaters). But we’ve moved on to more pressing matters, to be answered in Peterson’s other work: “If God Loves me, Why Can’t I get My Locker Open?”

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A tagline promising a murderous interspecies infant? Sign us up.

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Who would win in a fight: disembodied space baby or murderous cat baby?

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We can only assume this is a nonfiction guidebook mapping out a typical day in the life of a Canadian child. (What is she planning to do with that bat?)

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Grandma had to make money somehow . . .

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WHY IS THIS SO CREEPY!??!?!

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All hail the great and mighty cat god. (It’s not objectification if the woman is part feline, right?)

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Remember the part of the film when Princess Buttercup turns into a mutant half snake with a lopsided noggin? We don’t either. But as you wish, William Goldman, as you wish.

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Why is the crab using a sword instead of his razor sharp claws?

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Essential to a good book cover: blurry white Jesus face pasted on hairy CGI body.

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All it takes is glutes and boots. We assume the next scene involves the plucky hero being chopped to bits after the land octopus slices through his unprotected legs.

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What we know about the story: There’s a computer that manifests generic white dudes and fabulous unicorns.

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Christmas has come early, folks. And Santa brought you some computer-generated elf abs.

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A science-fiction novel, in which space is apparently not freezing. And what are the magical physics behind his uber-tiny leg?

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Never storm the castle without your aviators.

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The original Inside Out (2015), perhaps?

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WHY DO HIS HANDS HAVE HANDS!??!?!

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Everything a growing book cover needs: A keyboard, a chiseled woman in a weird half bra, and an Atari reference.

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In the Finnish version of Harry Potter, Dolores Umbridge is a mutant half-goblin, and there are two Harrys. We’re thinking the one in front is the evil twin.

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We like Dad’s pretty eyes. Not sure how we feel about his handgun.

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It wouldn’t be so bad without the disembodied child head.